I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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