All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize