Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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