if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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