I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I hope mine doesn't look like that
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize