i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Randomize
