She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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