Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
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