so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Slut skills are useful in every country.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
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Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
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I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
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