My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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