my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
be right there i have to get my cape
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize