my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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