Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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