was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
