your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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