So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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