you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
