Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Why is your signature on my underwear?
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize