My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Randomize
