Is it normal to miss your booty call?
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
All I want is dick and wine.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
