I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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