Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
