Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
