All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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