Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
