Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
