And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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