Texts From Last Night

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  (252): View more from North Carolina

  just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting

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  (252): just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting http://tfl.nu/rg7x
  Replies (3) Good night (518) Bad night (692) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.

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  (203): I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt. http://tfl.nu/mij5
  Replies (9) Good night (680) Bad night (938) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.

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  (443): There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers. http://tfl.nu/zfa6
  Replies (24) Good night (1112) Bad night (2749) Order T-Shirt
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.

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  (401): You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men. http://tfl.nu/u1rr
  Replies (28) Good night (3156) Bad night (784) Order T-Shirt
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.

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  (262): Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face. http://tfl.nu/let7
  Replies (4) Good night (601) Bad night (3315) Order T-Shirt
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  (320): View more from Minnesota

  Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks

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  (320): Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks http://tfl.nu/7398
  Replies (64) Good night (1299) Bad night (6299) Order T-Shirt
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.

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  (256): he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker. http://tfl.nu/xdnw
  Replies (60) Good night (601) Bad night (3985) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed

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  (303): I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed http://tfl.nu/1p3v
  Replies (24) Good night (735) Bad night (5631) Order T-Shirt
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  (813): View more from Florida

  It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.

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  (813): It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow. http://tfl.nu/0mxe
  Replies (18) Good night (1631) Bad night (5232) Order T-Shirt
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  (985): View more from Louisiana

  I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day

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  (985): I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day http://tfl.nu/t2zq
  Replies (10) Good night (3350) Bad night (821) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.

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  (617): I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition. http://tfl.nu/v2i1
  Replies (3) Good night (2193) Bad night (826) Order T-Shirt
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.

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  (678): All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know. http://tfl.nu/jvfd
  Replies (6) Good night (1143) Bad night (872)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.

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  (907): i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet. http://tfl.nu/l2j7
  Replies (5) Good night (1520) Bad night (445) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...

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  (516): yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye... http://tfl.nu/3it0
  Replies (2) Good night (710) Bad night (389) Order T-Shirt
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.

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  (312): Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag. http://tfl.nu/6eu4
  Replies (2) Good night (747) Bad night (349) Order T-Shirt

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