real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
