: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
