Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
