Please don't use social media to get back at me.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
