I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
