They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize