My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
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Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize