CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
