i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
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