just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
