Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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