: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
