Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
