I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
