My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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