i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
