idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
MIDGETS
????
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
