Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
