shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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