Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
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I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
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I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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