Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Randomize
