Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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