I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I hate all girls vehemently.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Randomize
