Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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